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sendmeyourmom

Last night’s episode of The Simpsons had one of the better exchanges I’ve ever heard on the show:

Bart: Why don’t you go pick on someone smaller and weaker?

Jimbo: Yeah.  Let’s go down to Sunshine Preschool and wail on some toddlers.

Kerny: We can sneak up on them why they’re napping.

Later, Bart and Nelson were sitting on a bluff together.

Nelson: I like to come up here and make fun of the sunset.  Hey Gas Ball; You suck!

At the end as Nelson rode away on his bike he turned around to Bart and said: “Ha Ha; I touched your heart!”

So today I discovered that another old trend has started to emerge from my past.  I am, it seems, that catalyst required for people to move on from their prior relationships.  This is not to say that people move on with me, it is only the prospect of moving on with me that makes girls ready to date someone they actually like.

When you get rejected you get to indulge in some self pity for a bit.  Lately I’ve even been robbed of that.  The ‘relationships’ I’ve entered into lately have ended before they’ve started and the girls’ moving on has either been hidden or so far removed from my circumstances that the relationship was nearly invisible to begin with.

Still, rejection does hurt, even when it’s indirect.  What hurts more though is that when something is hidden from me so I wouldn’t get hurt, it tells me that my feelings were considered and just didn’t matter.

My sleep patterns have been really off lately.  One day last week I went to bed at 930 in the evening and was up and ready to go at 400, some two hours before I even start getting ready to go to work.  Saturday I decided to lay back down at about 1030; I’d woken up not feeling very well at about seven.  I slept until my sister called me at 200 wondering why I wasn’t at my nephew’s birthday party.  And last night I was in bed by 900 and woke up at about 530.

Its not just my sleeping pattern that’s messed up though.  I’ve long been weird about eating.  I can easily go a day without eating, without even thinking about food.  I literally forget to eat some days.  The meals I do eat are usually in the mid-evening, around six or seven and then its often crap; fast food or frozen meals.  Lately I’ve been hungry at weird times.  I’ve eaten breakfast a few times in the past few weeks and even had a few days of three full meals. 

There’s more that’s been off but this isn’t the forum for all that stuff.  I don’t know what the cause of all this is.  All I know is that I want things to go back to normal. 

Last June I posted about a Shark and Gator that’d been seen hanging out around the parking lot where I work. Though she had nothing to do with the original appearance of Shark and Gator, my friend SS and her boyfriend took the plastic critters into their hearts and home. 

SS recently discovered Stillspinning and saw the post. She brought Shark and Gator to work today and gave them to me. 

I’m pleased as punch to have them.

Here’s a blast from the past, Dr. Jack Kevorkian (a.k.a. Dr. Death) is getting out of the pokey after doinig 8 years of a ten year stint.  For those of you who weren’t paying attention Dr. Jack was the guy who built a death machine (literally) in his basement with old soda bottles and some fishing line and started hooking people up to it.

Since Dr. Jack was pushing people into the hereafter in Michigan, where along with 49 other states its illegal, the doc was tossed in the slammer for his ‘assistance’.

Here’s the thing.  The “Right to Die” crowd couldn’t have made a worse choice for their poster child.  First of all the man is crazy.  Second, according to the picture below he’s a giant.  Those microphones are smaller than his index finger.  He’s got to be at least 30 feet tall.

Then there’s this. I actually used to own this record. It was less than great but the reactions people had to seeing it in the CD case was well worth the $2.00 I paid and the room it occupied in my CD wallet.

So Jack’s getting out.  I’m sure he’ll be up to his old antics again in no time.  Picking off the sick and old and screaming on CNN about how mean the government is for not letting him murder people.

How in the world can we have an employee named Trevelle and Trevellis and they not be twin brothers?  They’re not even related!

I’ve mentioned The Shins before.  They were on Austin City Limits this weekend - good show - and I’ve been playing the heck out of my CD.  This song is getting played over and over and over and… 

 Turn On Me

You can fake it for a while,
Bite your tongue and smile,
Like every mother does an ugly child.
But the stars are leaking out,
Like spittle from a cloud,
Amassed resentment counting ounce and pound.You’re entertaining any doubt,
Because you had to know that I was fond of you,
Fond of Y-O-U,
Though I knew you masked your disdain.
I can see that change was just too hard for us,
Hard for us.
You always had to hold the reigns,
But where I’m headed, you just don’t know the way.

My google homepage gives me an Ask Yahoo every day.  Today’s was the best question ever: “What is emo?”

The short answer is emo is best defined by looking at ‘emo kids.’  They have lots of weird hair, tight clothes and can be found at the mall looking sad and hungry.  They’re the kids you either want to hug or feed. 

If you’re interested in Emo music, bands like My Chemical Romance and Taking Back Sunday seem to popular choices. 

My mom used to work for Weight Watchers.  One of the members in her classes had a rather insensitive family and, for her birthday, gave her a cookie-bouquet.  Their thoughts were that they’d get to eat the cookies and laugh at her because she couldn’t eat them.  This was not to be.  The cookies were delivered when no one else was home so the woman took them and had the entire bouquet shellacked - so it’d keep.

Nice.