My mom used to work for Weight Watchers.  One of the members in her classes had a rather insensitive family and, for her birthday, gave her a cookie-bouquet.  Their thoughts were that they’d get to eat the cookies and laugh at her because she couldn’t eat them.  This was not to be.  The cookies were delivered when no one else was home so the woman took them and had the entire bouquet shellacked - so it’d keep.

Nice.